Sunday, March 30, 2008

Are your boots made for walking?

As a professional domme, I often think about my feet and the boots I wear. What's more I think about what I'm going to do with them. I recently came across this campaign for Kenneth Cole, asking for real people who live their lives in a different way, one category they seek to employ are sex workers. I've always liked Cole's thought provoking campaigns and I admire he does seem to be genuinely concerned with making a statement rather than just making a sexy ad for his shoes. I received this information a little late in the game, but thought it may be of some interest:

We are casting the Fall 2008 advertising campaign for Kenneth Cole. The campaign is called NON-UNIFORM THINKING and we hope to shine a light on different types of social issues facing people around the world. In particular we would like to profile those who work to end injustice both at home and abroad. The campaign will be an extension of what is running right now all across America
(www.kennethcole.com/) and will be a celebration of those individuals who strive to make a difference in the world around them. One issue we feel would be interesting to profile is that of sex workers and the dangers they face every day. Awareness is the most important aspect of change and most people do not understand what a sex worker even does and by enlightening those who do not know we can focus on ending the stigma and violence that plagues the community.

The ad campaign will run for 6 months in all print media (magazines, billboards, internet, in-store display) beginning in the fall. In addition we will be filming the shoot and interviewing those involved to be put on the kennethcole.com website. In the interview the person(s) can tell their story and discuss whatever they wish in relation to being a sex worker and the issues they face on a daily basis.

If this were to work out we will pay a fee of $3,500 to be distributed however they wish.

It will shoot in NYC the week of April 14th.

I have included some general information below about Kenneth Cole and images from the current campaign. Please visit http://www.kennethcole.com/thinkers/default.asp to see the complete advertising campaign as well as videos on all of the participants.

For the last 25 years, Kenneth Cole has been both innovative and provocative in raising awareness of a multitude of social causes and issues. As a company Kenneth Cole prides itself on doing things differently, and trying to make the consumer see society from a different perspective. The NON-UNIFORM THINKING campaign embraces this mindset and focuses on real people who live their lives in a different way – either by their own choice or through circumstance. By integrating interesting people of substance into this fashion campaign we hope to dispel all forms of social prejudice by celebrating diversity. Kenneth Cole strives to choose the path least worn and question the status quo. Our attitude is, "If we can't do it differently, it's not worth doing."


If you know of anyone who is interested please have them email info@swopusa.org with their story and a few photos of themselves asap.


Look forward to hearing from you.

Thanks so much


Sex Workers Outreach Project USA
Administrative Team
912 Cole St. #202
San Francisco, CA 94117
1-877-776-2004 #2

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Domina of the week on Pandemos

I am pleased to announce that I have been chosen as Domina of the week on Pandemos! (3/16/08-3/22/08)

Saturday, March 15, 2008

The Pleasure's All Mine ~ Book Review


I have been meaning to read this book for a long time, hoping it would give me insight into the life of a professional submissive. While I was a submissive, I felt it would be valuable to learn of another professional’s experience. Memoirs about one’s professional life in BDSM are few and far between, usually written after the person has left the scene, probably due to avoid giving out “trade secrets” as well as allowing her/his clients’ privacy. Or some publish personal accounts, but generally on a more educational level such as Midori or Jay Wiseman. However, although Kelly’s memoir markets her life as a professional submissive, I feel her real goal was to find some kinky sex.

Kelly starts by reminiscing of her one and only kinky boyfriend and how she misses the D/s aspect of their intimate lives. She attempts to find kink-like mates at a class offered by a BDSM group. This is a good start, but she doesn’t connect with many people. She does strike up conversation with one man, Clark, who later invites her over to his house to play, but correctly ascertains while she is willing, she is not totally ready to become involved in an extended scene. Clark later tells her about a commercial dungeon where submissives can get paid for role play, but he also warns her that many women can get burnt out playing professionally. I feel this is a fair warning; professional and lifestyle BDSM are as different as night and day. Most notably, professional BDSM does not include sex because as it stands, most of the United States classifies excepting money for sex as prostitution, which is illegal. Also, while some clients may become long-term regulars, lifestyle partners are usually ones that you spend a lot of time exploring and pushing limits.

Once hired, “Marnie” decides very quickly that she loves being a professional submissive, but doesn’t seem to have a clear idea of what that means; she seems unable to define her personal and BDSM boundaries. She allows herself to become much too physically and emotionally involved with a client. Again, this can be a difficult position to maintain because this is an intimate job. However, she enjoys it so much and realizes she can make so much more money than at her boring, dead end job, she decides to quit her straight job and work exclusively as a professional submissive against advice given to her. I feel this is another initial mistake of new professional players, while yes, this kind of job can be way more fun than filing papers and in a few hours can make your 40 hour week look pitiful, it still takes time to build up clientele to survive solely on playing. Also, there are periods of slow down and inexplicable cancellation, such as tax season as Marnie discovers when playing in New York. Even if you don’t “work” much at a straight job, you can still collect a pay check, and other benefits such as health insurance, sick and vacation time as well as many other amenities not afforded to an independent contractor.

She decides to leave the dungeon and become independent after what seems a matter of only weeks. Again, it should be noted that she seems to move through this decisions rather briskly: she has gone from exploring BDSM classes, to professional submissive in a dungeon, to quitting her day job, to finally becoming an independent submissive. While she does find players who respect her, she similarly finds Dommes who treat her merely as a submissive and not a professional player on equal grounds, such as when a Domme offers her a job as her personal assistant. I agree with Marnie that such an offer would not have been made to a professional Dominatrix.

However, throughout the rest of her scenes in the memoir, she sometimes includes sex in her sessions with clients, whether it be her masturbating, to finally having anal sex with a client.

This is a memoir; just one piece of one woman’s life who worked as a professional submissive. There is very little about what makes a successful or good professional submissive, but there are very few on the scene. This memoir serves as a guide of what not to do as a pro sub. She throws herself into the professional BDSM community because she longs for a D/s relationship akin to her one and only kinky boyfriend and because she enjoys making money being a submissive more than she enjoys working in a slow-paced office. I cannot judge her for the choices she has made, however, it seems she would have been better served searching for a kinky playmate to indulge in her fantasies because she clearly wanted to include sex in her play time.