Whip Smart ~ Book Review

When I first heard about Whip Smart by Melissa Febos, I must have had a crush on her about dozen different ways. First, she's a former Domme. Then she's published a book about her experiences. She runs a series in NYC. She has an MFA in Creative Writing from Sarah Lawrence. She teaches writing classes at a college. Her website is actually pretty cool. Okay, and finally, she is smoking hot. To my credit, I crushed on this last since I didn't see a picture of her until AFTER I found out all these things. That being said, I was really looking forward to reading her book. It seems to have caused quite a flutter. I'm saddened to say that I was really disappointed.

I'm not sure how someone can take BDSM, NYC, heroin and hot bisexual women hooking up, and make a boring story, but in that Febos succeeds. This book really had more to do with her drug use and struggle to stay clean--we are not taking about recreational party drug use here, we are talking about doing speedballs and shooting up before sessions.

The story is cliche: white suburban middle class oddball goes to NYC to find other oddballs, realizes shit is expensive and becomes a sex worker since the high hourly wage will not effect other recreational, artistic activities. I was forcing myself to get through the majority of this book--partially because I didn't find it very interesting but also because of the heavy drug use. I agree with Mistress Matisse's quip that it could have been called Needle Sharp. Read her well-written review in the Stranger here.

Then I ask myself: What am I really expecting when I read these memoirs? NONE of them admit, Hey, I really liked doing this and I was good at it. I made money, then I stopped. Now I write.

And I'm not really sure what the writers are expecting when they write it, but it seems to be something along the line of, Hey, I did this for a couple of years, barely enough to make a drop in the bucket so no one in the scene actually remembers or knows who I am until maybe when they see my new book. I had bad experiences in the sex industry, mostly due to my own problems BEFORE entering it and many CAUSED while in it, but hey, here's my book. Now I'm a writer and an adjunct.

Maybe I'm just reading the wrong memoirs. Anyone have any suggestions? (I have been reading The Unauthorized Autobiography of Master R, which I find fantastic and will post review when I'm finished.)

The Notorious Bettie Page

This is has been on my list for a long time and I finally procured a copy. I was reluctant to see it, since I heard it was not very good, but being that Bettie Page is such an iconic cult object to a fetish/BDSM crowd, any movie would likely be sub par to such elitists.

I do not know much about her life, but rather enjoyed the movie. Gretchen Mol looks so damn good as Bettie Page, I'm not sure why she bothers with Gretchen. Disturbing to me was the gang rape sequence since I cannot find anything regarding if this actually happened.

It is striking to me that as a fetish model, so many of her photos are of her smiling. Even though much of her style has been endlessly copied, I still cannot think of many modern fetish models who smile in their photographs. I'm always smiling in photo shoots--I have a lovely smile and no one ever sees it. Photographers are always telling me to look stern and serious, but I'm having too much fun, especially if there is another Lady involved.

As for the movie, I love the way it was shot--mostly in black and white, then sometimes in color, but still keeping the same tones and saturation as if it was 50s color.

It's sad that she and other photographers were persecuted for harmless photography and even today, we kinksters are seen as deviants, surely I've met assholes, vanilla and kinky alike. Whatever her reasons, I'm glad she was able to take the photographs that made her such a legend.

The Standard

(Photos: Robert C.)

Latex Party! Part Two

More latex . . . more pets!








(Photos: Robert C.)

Latex Party! Part One

Enjoying my latex pet . . .











(Photos: Robert C.)

Secretary

The last time I saw this movie was years ago, before I became a pro-Domme. It blew my mind what a totally different perspective I have of these movie now.

I still like it, but not as much as I did. Much like the movie Blow had more to do with being working class and making a living than it had to do with coke, I feel like Secretary has more to do with a personal journey of recovery than it has to do with BDSM.

But what I really like about the movie always, is that it showed the difference between bad hurt and good hurt. Lee cuts herself to relieve the pain she feels of living with her alcoholic, abusive father and co-dependent mother. However, when she gets spanked by her boss, she goes to a different place to experience and process that pain, and ultimately the humiliation from her boss. And I like that it shows both characters struggling with how to deal with their love of a D/s relationship, deviating from "the norm."

To me, it's more funny than sexy, like when she tries to spank herself or when she tries to find another play partner--haven't we all been there? It's just not the same as being with someone who rocks.

Enjoy this mainstream movie that touches on D/s. I'm interested in reading the story by Mary Gaitskill that this is based on, I have recently discovered her writing and I find it dark and intelligent.

Masque

Arriving a bit early, I temporarily panicked when I saw people not of the Fetishworld exiting El Cid. Did I have the wrong venue? wrong date? Or were they just really uninspired for the evening? However, I was correct and hence the universe did not come to a screeching halt. The diners were leaving their evening and inquired about the event about to take place. They said I looked absolutely beautiful.

I felt supremely elegant in a black latex gown by Inner Sanctum. The latex made good sexy swishing sounds as I walked. Standing in the garden, a Beautiful Lady offered me a lube up. Who am I to argue? There's something delightful erotic about being touched through latex, a shiny second skin.

In a couple of hours we were finally seated. I enjoyed the show and smelling other people's food, but myself and surrounding companions were not served. After midnight and several rounds of jack and coke, I lost track of where my food was, where the evening was going and what the fuck I was going to write about in my blog.

I finally quipped, I'm *only* a Dominatrix. Why would I expect any food at a dinner show?

We finally received our appetizers. It was supposed to be seared tuna. Instead we received tuna-sicles. My companions and I were reduced to hysterical laughter. We were tired, hungry and shit-faced. Why didn't we start a food fight? Er, a sploshing fest?

When my date inquired about our appetizers, the waitress responded, We have to make food for all these people.

All Points Bulletin.

It's not really the SERVERS fault. The kitchen is clearly too small to support the amount of diners present.

The performers were amazing. It's been awhile since I have since Sir Poppycock, but he is always such a dashing delight, even if he did not sing my favorite tune, The Last Unicorn. A truly elegant performer and MC. I always enjoy the talents of Bound Lotus, regulars in the fetish club scene and I was introduced to Karis, the Mystical Hooper from La Lucha Vavoom, an event I unfortunately missed this week. For some reason, I have always missed Goddess Soma's performances, so I was delighted in seeing her perform a FemDomme number with the Mistresses Olive and Eva.

The highlight of my evening was spotting a rare pair of Fluevog Grand Nationals. This, to a fetishist, is like a seeing a rare bird in the wild. There's sort of a beautiful moment in the fetish wild when you see a truly unique and or rare piece. People come up to you, sometimes with tears in their eyes and inquire if this is a Real McCoy. I never thought I would see a pair, live. I always thought I would encounter them in a museum, stuffed, beneath glass. So I was quite pleased to see them in their natural habitat. I approached the wearer, gingerly, and asked, Are those a pair of Fluevog Grand Nationals? She replied, Yes, and that she basically sold her soul for them. She added that they were the first run. I asked if I could touch them. She consented. It was one of the few occasions I can be seen in public kneeling. I gave them a good pat.

I attended the play party which was enjoyable, but the proceeding events were so wretched, I was not of mind to play. I enjoyed torturing my boy toy digging My heels deeply into his back while I chatted with other guests.

All in all, there were many splendid moments in the evening, but others were pure torture. And I like to be the one giving torture, not the one receiving it.

C'mon on Barbie, let's go party

In some ways, Barbie is the original life-like fetish object, paving the way for cartoons, blow-up dolls, anime and the like. Drastically unproportionate with a tiny waist, large breasts, big eyes and long blonde hair, many porn stars, models or actresses seek to emulate this look, notably Pamela Anderson.

I have a confession to make. I love Barbie. I used to collect them, but found myself not enjoying the modern Barbie, but instead focusing on the vintage Barbies of the 60s. Like much of the 60s, I'm drawn to the clean, classic lines of her pale blue eyeshadow, thick eyeliner; perfectly coordinated wardrobe with matching shoes and handbags for every outfit. I have stopped collecting Barbies, but love the work of Judy Ragagli who makes photo realistic oil paintings of vintage Babies. Platinum Swirl has been on my wishlist for ages.

The theme at Club Hell last night was Barbie's Hell House. So I posted the following on my social media sites:

Going to Hell tonight as the Barbie who got all her hair cut off by a creative child. And wears all leather. Seriously, why isn't there a dominatrix Barbie? Mattel?

Many people responded. Here are some of the fetish themed Barbies that are out there:





































































As for myself, I geared up with my crotch high black leather boots, corset, short skirt and some metallic hot pink eyelashes. Even though I also wore blue eyeshadow, no one commented on my resemblance to Barbie. I was still a hit.

Barb Wire

If I'm going to see Casablanca one more damn time, it might as well be this cyberpunk version with Pamela Anderson traipsing about a shitty America in fishnets and black leather corsets.

I recently caught this movie on late one night. Okay, we've all seen it and it's totally cheese, but I still get a kick out of it. Like when Barb is out bounty hunting and seduces a gentleman for her services. He comes out in a full hooded suit and she asks if he washed his hands. He says, No, I've been bad, and Barb knocks him out with a wooden paddle, shrugs and says, Oops! There's also some CBT of a belligerant drunk demanding more drink and her dog Camille. And CBT always brings a smile to my face.

London called

I answered and said, Yes!

I'm very excited to be going to London and Berlin with some of my favorite supersexyshiny friends. I will be there for the
Torture Garden parties.

Though I am well-traveled, I have never been to London nor Berlin; neither have I been to any TG parties, so I am thrilled!

I plan to be very busy with TG, and being a tourist, but I'll be sneaking in some sessions too!

I will be in London and Berlin from April 25th to May 8th. I will be at TG on Saturday and Sunday. I am having a special unicorn outfit made for the occasion!

When I know more specifics I will be posting updated travel arrangements.

Cheers!