Blogroll

I've been meaning to do this for a long time. There are so many other talented writers in the sex industry, I enjoy reading what they have to say. Oh, the internet. It controls the way I market myself as a pro-domme as it does for most other people involved in the industry. I can't imagine what it was like before! For better or for worse, I feel lucky that I can be exposed to the thoughts and playing styles of so many different people in the industry. I admire them and unfortunately do not read them enough or even know about many blogs that I should be reading. So today I listed many blogs of note, some are pretty well known, some I have read, and others I want to read. I expect to make edits and additions as I spend even more time on my computer doing kinky things.

On a side note, a lot of people have mentioned the Showtime show, Secret Diary of a Call Girl based on the blog of Belle du Jour. (Name taken from a rather unexciting movie about a housewife turned prostitute.) I haven't seen it, but heard she got some lessons from a Domme ;) How is it?

Unconscious

I can't tell you much about this Spanish film without totally giving it away as it is a detective story but, trust me, it's got all your favorites, BDSM, kink, taboo and Freud. I highly recommend it; it was hilarious, tender and intelligent.

Ain't No Pain like Champagne!

A friend invited me to a party at the beach for 4th of July along with other very attractive ladies. I love that since I have moved to LA, I tend to arrive with Beautiful Ladies en masse. This time one of the Beautiful Ladies brought her accordian and played Dresden Dolls' Coin-Operated Boy in the limo.

Entering the house, I saw my future my coffee table. A beautiful mannequin dressed like a dominatrix with a glass topper. I never envied a coffee table's boots before.

It was just such a pleasant day, going down to the beach and frolicking in the waves, drinking Dom Perignon and eating this amazing soul food. I'm not really a mac'n'cheese kinda gal, but this was superb.

Also, I fell in love with a band, Dropjoy from San Diego, who played a set. It's been so long since I've seen a really great modern rock'n'roll band that wasn't a regurgitation of every thing I've ever seen since I was going to shows in junior high. Oh, Dropjoy, why are you so far away from me!

I'm not a fan of fireworks, but I walked down to the beach to view them with my friends. We sang the Star-Spangled Banner which gave me mixed feelings. Great song, we knew all the words--why can't I feel that way anymore? I'm sad to say this is not the land of the free, possibly for some of the brave, but certainly not free.

But to end on a pleasant note, Cousin Lovers closed out the night. I love the fiddle. It took all my strength not to scream out my request for Devil went Down to Georgia, but a love song was dedicated to us, all the Beautiful Ladies on the couch.

Thank you everyone for such a lovely 4th of July!

Masque

This was my first time attending Masque. I must say, I really enjoyed this event. What an excellent idea to have a "black-tie" fetish event dinner show. I love good food, entertainment and kinky beautiful people.

Prior to this event, I got into my head that I really wanted to be a unicorn, but decided it was too complicated to do well with such a short amount of time. For now I decided to go like Audrey Hepburn from Breakfast at Tiffany's, very classic with a simple black dress and a black pearl necklace.

Imagine my surprise when the ringmaster/MC Prince Poppycock burst out into song: The Last Unicorn! One of my favorite childhood animations and the music is so enchanting as well. During a performance, I find the Prince at the bar and tell him how much I loved his rendition of The Last Unicorn and how I wanted to be a unicorn. He told me that he was looking for someone to be a unicorn but we agreed that is a pretty difficult costume to pull off properly. Oh, Poppycock, I want to be your last unicorn!

Domina of the week on Pandemos #2

I have been chosen as Domina of the week on Pandemos again! (June 22-June 29)

I see L.A. as a beautiful blonde with dirty underwear*

I had a delightful time with my best-friend O. who came in from out of town. She is the Blonde to my Brunette, a fellow Tallsie, my partner in crime--when we get together there is bound to be trouble and jealous girlfriends.

It was only her second time in LA and it was uncharacteristically hotter than balls, so we eat lots of ice cream and go to the beach. I finally get to try the strange flavors of Scoops like Jim Beam and vanilla; cardamom and goat cheese and lavender. We admire the many boys of bicycles riding about the street.

She was quite amused at my newest slave who did his best to please us by cleaning and taking care of the litter box.

We go out to a bar and an extremely annoying guy starts talking to us. I'm hoping this drunk slovenly bastard will go away and then he asks me what I do so I tell him I'm a Dominatrix. He immediately gets front and center (interesting how that happens), asking me questions about it, saying he could offer me a spot on his show in exchange for spanking him for an hour. Really? O. jumps in and acts like my agent, asking how many hits it gets etc., but obviously this would boost his ratings more than mine and why would I want to spank you on a internet radio show? This is such a strange thing about LA, it is so about what I can do for you and what you can do for me. I have yet to have someone offer me anything worth my time.

O. has taken some BDSM/fetish photos for me before and I'm hoping we could shoot together again. She also did this wonderful animated illustration of one of my photos. She is so wonderfully gifted, but her time was too short for this trip and it was too blasted hot to do a photo shoot. Instead, she took lots of pictures of my cat and my toys. Cats love BDSM toys. It's true.

After grabbing some sushi, we walk down the end of the pier in Venice. There are lots of people fishing at night. A man stops, stares and shouts after us, Whoa! Are you two ladies Brazilian?


(*David Boreanaz)

I'm back in LA

Most days I'm not really sure I like LA--there's a lot of traffic, flaky people and concrete. But here's what I like about LA--there's no humidity and no bugs. I missed my cats, my ladies and my favorite kinky people.

Adventures in New Jersey

The day I arrive, a heat wave occurs pushing temperatures into the high nineties with equal humidity. I proceed to crash, waking, drinking a pina colada and go for a swim. It's a surprise birthday party. There's a pinata. I say, I have a blindfold! Someone shoots me a look and says, Are you sure it's scene appropriate?

Later, I go to a camping store to fit me for a harness to go rock climbing. One passes a certain point where everything becomes a sex or BDSM toy. I'm very excited to be in this harness testing it out in the store, hanging from a strong nylon tie from an I-beam in the ceiling, I start flipping over, imagining myself to be an aerialist.

Over dinner, I tell my date I will pee on him later that night. He gets visibly excited until he notices my side of asparagus . . .

Thank you!

I have been meeting so many lovely people in my BDSM life smushing into my "vanilla" life, and I just wanted to say thank you!

Bound to be Free ~ Book Review

I have read many books about BDSM and I find many of them sadly lacking. Two reasons exist for sub par BDSM literature, first, these books are written by someone who is first a BDSM practitioner and second, a writer. While a person may be very knowledgeable in his/her field, it does not mean that person possesses the unique skill to convey that information eloquently. Second, it is very difficult, if not impossible to learn BDSM practices from a book, which is written for the general public who may know nothing about BDSM. I imagine publishers of a book that could end up in anyone's hands would prefer to err on the side of caution, meaning one will only read about the most basic of BDSM practices. Also, no one in the scene currently playing will be wont to give out "industry secrets" and want to protect the identity and activities of their submissives/slaves.

Having said all that, I still dutifully read these books in hopes I might find some useful information or could recommend it to others. I think Bound to be Free is one of the best books I have read on the subject for several reasons.

First, Bound to be Free is written by two people; one a long-time member of the community and the second a doctor who is interested in BDSM from a clinical standpoint. I feel that this combination does well to give a well-rounded description of what BDSM is and why people do it.

Second, this book is not a how-to manual. Instead it focuses on the history, why people are drawn to it and various opinions of individuals in the scene. There are anecdotes from submissives, Switches and Doms of all genders and sexualities. They give their opinions on the scene, roles, stigmas, problems etc.

Some of the information is outdated in regards to the kind of groups in the Bay Area or how to find a play partner--most people are now using the internet and play parties/bars/clubs as their meeting grounds.

I would recommend this book to anyone who is interested in BDSM, especially as a novice. This is the first book you should read before getting into manuals. However, I also believe that long-time practitioners would benefit as well since it does such a good job about breaking down why we like this stuff! Might I add that this is also a superb book for kinksters to get their vanilla lovers into BDSM since it presents the subject in a matter of fact light without judgment or stigma. If your Mom accidentally stumbles upon your whips and handcuffs, give her this book so she can understand that you are not nuts.